Belarus' birthday
by UnhelpfulPanda
Summary: 2010 2011-up
1. 2010

1 am and I have school tomorrow...I am so dumb, I think I'm going to take my hidden knife from my hidden stash of hidden things and slit my throat. so if you never see another chapter of Potato-in-law, and no more birthday fanfics come out...you know what happened

alright, I'm not that dumb on sleep deprivation...am I? oh shit.

* * *

Belarus stared down at her cell phone, waiting for it to ring. "Well, maybe I should-" She started, reaching for it.

"Don't do it!" Poland piped up from the doorway. Belarus glared at the crossdresser.

"Hey…is that my skirt?" Belarus pointed out.

"Oh yes, doesn't it look, like, fabulous on me?" Poland giggled. Lithuania started to drag the blonde away.

"Sorry, Belarus," He sighed. Belarus rolled her eyes, continuing to stare at the phone. Once again, she reached for it.

"I-I absolutely, positively hate you!" Latvia screamed, storming into the room. Belarus sighed. Estonia chased after the smallest Baltic, slipping on the tile floor.

"Oh yeah? Well you're just a little whore who…who just so happens to hold your liquor very well!" Estonia paused, realizing he had just complimented the curly-haired blonde.

Latvia straightened his back proudly. "E-even better than R-Russia!" He smiled. Then he glared at Estonia. "A-and much be-etter than y-you, Ed-duard!" He sneered.

"You're a little bastard crybaby!" Estonia shouted back. Latvia grabbed the nearest vase and threw it at the oldest Baltic.

"I hate you!" He shrieked, dashing to his room. Estonia stood there.

"Hi, Estonia," Belarus waved.

"Hello, Belarus. Raivis, wait!" Estonia called, once again chasing after him. Belarus sighed.

"_You're a bitch, but I love you anyways! Oh, you can't sing, but you still_-"

Belarus lunged for her phone, catching her breath and answering with a sweet, "Hello?"

"Nattie?"

"Oh, Jose!" Belarus giggled. "I thought you were someone else!" She lied.

"…someone else?" Mexico's voice was laced with envy.

"Da," Belarus smiled.

"Ah. Wait, what?"

"Why didn't you call me earlier?" Belarus demanded.

"Don't do that, Nattie! You know that I'm always scared you'd fall for someone else…"

"I'm not going to, idiot," Belarus grumbled.

"Achoo!" Belarus frowned.

"Still sick?" she asked.

"Yeah, they _just_ capped the oil spill. Took them long enough."

"So…" Belarus decided not to say anything about her birthday. "You busy tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I've got loads of things to do. I don't actually have to do the stuff, but…well, it would be dumb of me not to."

"What is it?" Belarus asked. A large smash followed by some choice swears in Spanish.

"CANADA! Your fucking bear knocked something over AGAIN!" the line went dead.

"Bastard hung up on me," Belarus huffed. Russia walked into the room. Still, the older blonde was nervous around her, though not terrified anymore.

"B-Belarus. Privet," Russia greeted, eyes darting around the room. Belarus smiled softly.

"Privet, Big Brother," She greeted.

"Um…your birt'day is tomorrov, da?" He asked. Belarus nodded.

"Da."

"Ukraine and I vanted to do somet'ing special for you, so ve decided to take you out to eat somvhere nice," Russia explained. Belarus smiled brightly, hugging him.

"Thanks, Russia!" She smiled. Russia was in shock. "Too bad Mexico can't go; he's _busy_!" Belarus huffed. Russia smiled softly.

"Have some chocolate. You do not need no stinking boyfriend!" Russia said in a girly tone. Belarus giggled; Russia could be a good big brother sometimes.

"Thanks," she smiled. Russia kissed her forehead and frowned at the broken vase.

"It's bed-buddy tension, isn't it?" Belarus frowned. Russia sighed and nodded.

Suddenly, there was a loud commotion over at the front door. Denmark walked into the living room with Ukraine, smiling at her as she thanked him for walking her home (probably for the millionth time). He saw Russia there and cleared his throat.

"Ah, little brother! Baby sister!" Ukraine ran up, her large breasts bouncing loudly, making Russia blush and Belarus feel depressed about her own chest size. Ukraine squished them both with her boobs when hugging them. Denmark was blushing too.

"I was just walking her home; no need to worry!" Denmark announced in his loud voice.

"T'ank you, Denmark. See yourself out," Russia glared. Denmark chuckled nervously, glancing at Ukraine, and left. Ukraine sat down next to Belarus.

"Did Russia tell you about your birthday present from us?" she smiled. Belarus nodded, hugging her.

"Da. Thank you, Ukraine!" Belarus smiled. Ukraine looked at her watch.

"Ah, but the place we are going isn't in Belarus, or Ukraine or Russia. So you should go to bed now so you can wake up and we can catch our plane. By the time we get there, it will be lunchtime," Ukraine explained.

"Da~! So go to sleep!" Russia giggled. Belarus sighed, nodding and going to bed.

Belarus woke up to Russia shaking her. "Nattie, ve are here," He told her, smiling. Belarus stretched, standing up and looking around. Ukraine was a bit ahead, already halfway off the plane. Belarus followed Russia off the plane, then gasped as she was picked up by a third person and spun around.

"Put me down!" She ordered. She was put back on her feet, but before she could regain composure and look around, a kiss was planted on her lips. "Jose!" She gasped.

"You thought I'd miss my sweet snow angel's birthday?" Mexico grinned goofily, kissing her gently. Belarus smiled into the kiss. She took his hand and he led her to the restaurant, where a pile of presents sat on a table top.

"Um…well, these two are from my brothers. That is from my dad, that one is from my uncles, the Italies. And that one is from the Baltics," Mexico named off, pointing. He handed Belarus the one from Spain.

"A…thong?" Belarus asked.

"Kolkolkolkol-"

"O-oh dear!" Ukraine blushed and looked away. Mexico grabbed it from her.

"Hehehe, probably France!" He chuckled nervously, stuffing the thong in his pocket. Belarus shrugged and grabbed the one from the Baltics.

"It's a bracelet. And its got my name engraved on it," Belarus smiled softly. Mexico handed her the own from the Italy brothers. "Wow, a painting from Italy and a…" Belarus squinted to read the note. "A 'nice to you for a day' ticket from yours bitchily…" Belarus rolled her eyes.

Belarus pulled out a black and white spaghetti-strap dress from America. She gave Mexico a skeptic look. "Ehehehe, sorry," Mexico shrugged. Belarus then pulled out a whip from Canada. "Eh? Canada, why would you betray me?" Mexico cried dramatically. Belarus smirked.

After eating dinner, Ukraine and Russia went to a hotel. Mexico dragged Belarus home. "I'm going to go to the bathroom; I'll be back," She told him.

"Hurry, my lovely snow angel," Mexico purred. Belarus left the room. Mexico smirked to himself, pulling out the black thong his dad and France had sent.

"Jose~?" Mexico turned and held his nose, staring at Belarus as she came up, wearing her new dress, whip in hand. She put it under Mexico's chin. "Do you want to play a game?" She asked seductively. Mexico smirked, holding up the thong.

"I think I do." He pulled her down onto the couch.

"Not here," Belarus scowled.

"The bedroom is so far away though!" Mexico whined. Belarus puffed out her cheeks and turned her head away.

"A lady doesn't make love on a couch." Mexico groaned, picking her up and throwing her over his shoulder. (he made sure to grab her ass while he was there).

"Fine, then. You, little _lady_, are in for a looooong night!

* * *

not one bit of checking this over. if there's a mistake, shove it up your dog's ass and feed it to your Uncle Cat!

(I'm so sorry, I love you all, please fave and review. don't hesitate to tell me how fucking stupid I am, either...because I am...shit, I'm hungry too...


	2. 2011

I hope you like this one, I think it's pretty cute!

* * *

Mexico paced back and forth as he thought up things to do. "Not the beach, not a picnic…surprise party? No, she's got a tendency to stab things when she's scared…" Mexico nommed on his burrito nervously.

"That was so fun! Thank you for paying for me!" A young micronation named Wy smiled, blushing slightly.

Another micronation, a bit older, named Seborga, smiled back. "It's no big deal, _Bella_! It was my pleasure to escort a pretty lady like yourself to the movies!" He smiled brightly.

Wy huffed. "It's not like I couldn't have gone by myself," She grumbled. Seborga laughed.

"Yeah right, you were terrified! You would have ran off crying if you tried to see a scary movie like that by yourself!" He jeered. Wy clenched her fists.

"Unlike you, I have already been recognized as a country! Jerk!" She glared, storming off.

Seborga groaned. "Wy, wait! I didn't mean it like that!"

Mexico threw his arms in the air. "Aha!" he shouted. His burrito fell by his foot. "Damn it…"

* * *

"This better be a really freaking good movie," Belarus grumbled. Mexico led her by the hand to the ticket booth.

"Two super special awesome tickets for Brain Suckers please!" Mexico grinned. The ticket person turned around.

"Absolutely not," America retorted.

"A-Alfred!" Mexico whined. America shook his head and fiddled with paperwork.

"That movie is rated R, and I'm not about to let you in," America stated.

"But its for Natalia's birthday!" Mexico whined.

"I don't care! Remember last time?" America challenged.

"I was twelve, Al!" Mexico groaned.

"Forget it, Jose. Go see a romantic comedy or something," America rolled his eyes.

"Alfred! I'm telling Papa Spain!" Mexico pouted. Alfred sighed loudly.

"Fine, but don't come sobbing to me when your girlfriend calls you a scaredy-cat," America growled, shoving the tickets at his younger brother.

"Yay!" Mexico smiled, taking Belarus' hand again. Belarus shot America an irritated look.

* * *

Mexico sat down in one of the seats, the popcorn in his hands. Belarus sat next to him, looking around at the other people. "_This is great! Natalia will get so scared, and I'll be super smooth and hold her at the scary parts_!" Mexico thought to himself. The movie started.

As Mexico watched, however, he realized that he had extremely over-estimated himself. The movie terrified him, and he started to whimper and shake. Belarus, however, chuckled at the same parts that scared him. She absently took the popcorn from him and began to eat. Mexico cringed at another scary part, and Belarus just started to grin.

Mexico cringed again, covering his face with his hands and peeking out at the screen. Belarus' grin only widened, and she was fascinated with the movie. Mexico shrieked suddenly at a scary part, and Belarus looked over at him, amused further.

"You alright, Jose? We can go if you want," She offered.

"N-no, I've gotta keep watching! I'm the hero!" he reassured, mentally slapping himself when he realized who he sounded like. He screamed again, hiding his face. Belarus held out her free arm for him.

"Want me to hold you at the scary parts?" She asked. Mexico nodded, humiliated, and cuddled up against her, shrieking and hiding his face in her cleavage. Belarus just continued to watch, her grin returning. She absently munched on popcorn.

* * *

Belarus skipped out of the movie theatre, happy with her birthday present. She turned to Mexico, watching him slowly trudge out, hands in his pockets and his head turned to the side, scowling off into the distance.

"Hey, Jose. Don't throw a Teenage Fit on me," Belarus teased. Mexico 'hmph'ed. "Don't be a baby. I'm sorry I wounded your man pride," Belarus apologized, though she really didn't mean it and they both knew.

"You didn't wound my man pride!" Mexico retorted coolly. Belarus scrunched up her nose.

"Sorry, I forgot that pointing out that your man pride is wounded just wounds it more," she grumbled. With an exasperated sigh, the Belarusian grabbed her boyfriend by his shirt collar and kissed him.

Mexico blinked. "Duuuuuuh...que?"

* * *

Mexico sat in bed, whimpering and biting nervously at his pillow. He looked down at it, spitting it out. He really needed to lose that nasty habit of biting on things/eating things when he was nervous.

Mexico gasped as he heard a sound in the dark of his room. He whimpered again, curling up into a ball. The door opened slowly, and he cowered back and finally screamed. "Not my brain; don't suck out my brain!" He wailed.

The light flicked on. "Alfred, get your ass in here!" Canada snapped with his small voice. He hurried forward.

Mexico screamed. "No, its a ghost Brain Sucker! Don't come, Al, its a trap!" Mexico yelled. Canada pinched his older brother. "Ouch, Mat!" he squeaked. Then he realized what he had said. "Mat! So its not a Brain Sucker! Hurra!" He cheered.

America stumbled into the room. "Wha, wha's goin on?" he slurred out.

"You let Jose watch Brain Suckers, didn't you?" Canada accused. America shot a glare Mexico's way. "You both know that scary movies don't mesh well with you!" Canada sighed.

"Unlike you, sadistic little-" Canada glared at his oldest brother before he could finish.

* * *

yes, I see both Belarus and Canada and those who extremely enjoy gory horror films. And about the name of the movie...just a random generic name

America works in a ticket booth for the movie theater. yes. In my headcanon, they have jobs so they can fit in with normal humans. also, Canada works at IHOP, England works with antiques, France is a chef, and the Italy brothers own a resturaunt called The Pastified Princess. there's other stuff, but let's not ramble on about them.


End file.
